I was late to the mic this afternoon. I set out to make a bunch of pulled pork cheesesteaks to share around and promptly ran out of propane, necessitating a trip to exchange the tank (in proper socially distant fashion). Got ’em finished, but it took an hour out of the program. Still, we got our licks in. The Navy punished the captain of the U.S.S. Theodore Roosevelt for trying to protect his crew. Georgia Senator Kelly Loefler sends warm fuzzies to all her rubes, er, constituents. Texas Gov celebrates taking constitutional rights away from women. America gets its youngest COVID-19 victim (not that MAGATS give a tinker’s dam). “Mexican violence,” asked President Emily Litella.