Podcast

Sweet, bleeding Jesus, but this grows wearying. A Nazi incel slaughters people at a mall cuz he can’t get laid. And none, I mean NONE of the multi-millionaire ForProfit Media will go deeper than “mental health.” It tasks me! Maybe it’ll show up on my filthy morning habit in a couple of weeks. Too, also: we have a GROOMER! Curiously, neither gay, a drag queen, or trans. Feels like a clue!

Y’all, we bounce from one existential crisis to the next. The next one is breathing down my neck. Appalachian Power wants their money. A lot of money. This community survives by miracles. Human ones. If you can help keep this little miracle of a broadcast alive, please do! Thank you! 

Happy Cinco de Mayo. More tequila will be sold today in the U.S. than any other day of the year. The drip,drip, drip of graft, sleaze, and utter corruption from Fap-Fap and Gin-Gin (ft. Har-Har and Lee-Lee) continues unabated. Good. Testicle Toasting Tuckyo Rose Carlson keeps getting weirder and the suits at FockSnooz are getting scratchy about it. DiFi is coming back to the Senate . . . maybe next week.

We’re facing dire times at The H.O.R.N. We finished the week still unfunded by $250 with some horrorshow bills coming. Please help if you can. As ever, you have my eternal, undying gratitude!

NGL: I’m good at this analysis stuff. Give it a couple of days/weeks/sometimes months, and the ForProfit Media will catch up with me. Fappy. Domestic terrorism. There’s a connection. I’m gonna mention this term for the Record: “Constructive Secession.” It’s where we are. 

In the meantime, we struggle to survive, from one bill to the next.

How Tuckyo Rose finally found the tender spot in the morals of FockSnooz. Charlie Kirk auditions to replace him by defending him. TakesAss MAGAT introduces uterine clown car tax breaks. South Carolinastan wants to execute more women. Oregon MAGATS refuse to do their jobs. NRA Roulette Wheel of Death stops in Midtown Atlanta. Loyalty Oath at a MAGAT church in Floriduh. NAACP member breaks MomferLiburdy Karen’s braims. Betty White banned in Floriduh.

OK, so something happened with my audio. It’s awful at first. Then I sorted it out (without actually finding out what’s wrong). Anyway, this is a SCOTUS-heavy broadcast because our Most Puissant Dread Sovereign Supreme Catholic Majesties made it that way. It’s bad. Nasty, even. 

Newly unsafe in Gunmerica: being a pitcher warming up in the bullpen. But these here shooter weren’t lawful gun owners so don’t say that. PornHub goes patriotic. Marge goes crazy(er). SCOTUS takes aim at “the administrative state.” Dark Brandon kills at the Nerd Prom.

Well, now! How much more crooked can SCOTUS be? We have no idea how deep the graft runs. Gunplay at MAGAT meeting in PA. MTQ declares who is and isn’t a “mother.” One MAGAT mother says she’d rather see her child dead than . . .  oof. 

The return of the Manchin Whisperer. Nah, not really. I just get sick and tired of watching him screw over America. And what a choice I have in November 2024! Yuck. Meanwhile, in New Hampshire . . . Nitwit Nero grumbles about EVs raising clouds of “dirt.” No field trips to see plays for some school kids in Texas! 

The story of why I missed Tuesday’s episode. Why Tuckyo Rose really got canned. Feeedumm breaks out to the usual fatal effects in Illinois. Nitwit Nero does defamation again . . . some more. Lying is cool for Montana MAGATS; facts . . . not so much.

Testicle-toasting Tuckyo Rose Carlson, Man of Masculinity, gets the boot, probably because he got Rupey sued again . . . some more. Don Lemon got the axe at CNN, too. NBC/Comcast exec couldn’t keep his trousers zipped and he’s gone, as well. Spanish facist gets dug up and buried elsewhere because Spain has no tolerance for Fascism. Way to go, Spain! Law Enforcement fulminates and panics over a movie while actual nazis continue to plot against “our democracy.” Killer cop gets a new gig. 

The DiFi Dilemma. You’ll hear something here no one else has likely said. SCOTUS preserves the right to use Mifepristone . . . for now . . . till they can REALLY stick it to the people who need it. Fappy Thomas keeps getting dirtier and it’s getting less likely there will be any consequences. Joe-To-The-Manchin-Born sticks up for the Weaker Speaker and his vicious “plan.” 

Happy 420!

Fappy Thomas just gets dirtier. Montana MAGATS just get nastier. Marginal Trailer Queene justs gets crazier. This nation just gets crueller. Gun violence just gets easier.

Keeping up with the lawful gun owners is becoming a full-time job! A kid on a porch, a girl in a car turning around, kids at a Sweet 16, and now . . . cheerleaders in Texas. Who shoots a CHEERLEADER?! Oh, wait. A lawful gun owner does. 

And so much more . . . or less . . . 

I know we all wanted Rupee Murdoch dragged into the street and torn to pieces, but that wasn’t going to happen. And it wouldn’t have been our best moment. But please, BREATHE. Pyramids must be destroyed from the top down. 

Meanwhile, back in America . . . LAWFUL gun owners.

Gym “Jacket Off” Jordan brings his circus to Manhattan. ZOMG! Secret Smiles! The white caucus of Tennessee gets caught being themselves. Oklahomastan governor is shocked, SHOCKED to find out other Republicans are homicidal racists. Slaughters in Talabama and Kentuckystan. Old white men with guns shooting kids who get lost on the way home.

Sammy Bad Breath gives a five day reprieve to Mifepristone. Fappy Thomas has to go and more people are figuring it out. Paying attention Merrick? The white wing is working overtime to turn the 21 year old traitor into a hero. 

We’re behind in fundraising by over $1,000. This little network exists on a shoestring. Your kindness keeps it going.

Take your pick: a gun humper, right-wing racist, or a woman who says she knows who’s a real lesbianl. Same-Same. All Awful.

C’mon down that blood red aisle! A sermon from a dead groomer Evilgelist becomes a reality in the Missouri House. Fox’s problems keep birthing new problems. Nitwit Nero tries to sue a witness into silence. Texas MAGAT mansplains what women’s real problems are, besides being second class citizens: “Stop talking about abortion!” The triumphant return of the Tennessee Two to the scene.  

Sorry about Monday. I wish the meth heads (or Nazis, or whomever) would quit cutting my ISP’s lines. At any rate, the week begins with three busy hours. Mass murder, hostage standoffs, the Dirty Lama, a groomer who is, of course, a MAGAT. Sorry about the late upload. Some days . . . 

Fappy has . . . an excuse. Russian death merchant predicts Nitwit Nero’s death. Whiney FART (Feminism Appropriating Reactionary Transphobe) bleats and brays because people called out her hate. Tennestan Republicans called out for their fascism.